Growth...of our our walk with all things to worship HIM!

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Me of Little Faith...

We have been living in bliss the past few weeks!!! 

We are skype-ing with the most beautiful boy in the world!!

I especially love to watch his gorgeous eyes dance when he speaks to us...
and then there is the sweet voice laced with a charming Filipino accent.  


We (and the family we hope to travel with) have been waiting to receive our I 800 visa approval.  
My sweet friend called me Thursday morning to tell me that she just got off the phone with the immigration officer.  She told me that she got her approval and that I needed to call immigration right away!!  

I was overjoyed!!

I sent my paperwork the same time she did 
so there was a wonderful chance we would get ours as well:)  

I was routed to the correct officer and learned that she had our file in hand, 
and would review it this morning for approval!!!

If we received the approval that day...another week would be shaved off our anticipated timeline!!!  We have been reminded many times that it would take a miracle to get the boys home by Christmas, but we have continued to pray and believe!!

I was dancing around our home envisioning Christmas lights twinkling in our son's eyes as we read the Christmas story from the Bible together in our PJ's Christmas morning.  

My beloved day dream came to a screeching halt just a few minutes later 
when the Immigration Officer called me back.

I was informed that the ICAB didn't send the documents that they usually send with the referral.  I looked over my copy of the documents and asked if a certain document would be sufficient. 

The officer got off  the phone to talk to her supervisor.
And I called my hubby, who is on a business trip in CA, so that we could pray together.  

A few minutes later I learned that immigration will not accept our document...and that we have to get our hands on a different one.  

I will be completely honest with you...I fell in a heap and cried hysterically.  

Not attractive, I am fully aware.  

I felt like the lights went out on my Christmas miracle.  

The good news is that I didn't stay there!  

After much prayer and worship throughout the day, I eventually came back to truth.

God didn't stop being in control because I received news I didn't want or anticipate.  

This new bump in the road was not a surprise to HIM.

HE didn't leave my side...I simply looked away.

It frustrates me that I can still be shaken so quickly.
It is confirmation to my need to be firmly planted in Christ throughout the day.
I did devotions that morning.  I worshipped and prayed.

But when the unexpected came...I still faltered.

I still have much to learn in this journey.
My prayer is that I will grow in HIM every step of the way and that HE will continue to mold and craft me into who HE has made me to be!

Friday, October 19, 2012

The Journey Is Not a Competition...

I have been quiet over here at grown2worship.  

Not because there is nothing to share.

It is quite the opposite really...
my heart is bubbling over and I would love to spill my guts.

So what is holding me back?  

fear of hurting another adoptive mama's feelings, fear of jealousy, fear of sharing too much...

The bible is clear that fear is not of the Lord!

so it is time to put fear in it's proper place...under my feet!!

When on the adoptive journey 
(or any other journey God has you on) 
we have to realize that Christ is completely in control of the journey.  

What do I mean...well, if we pray for God to 
lead us to our children, 
open doors, 
provide finances,
and that 

Then we have to believe that HE WILL ANSWER PRAYER!

Where we get into trouble is that we want our prayers answered 
our way 
and in our timing!!!

In these moments we are simply wanting a genie in a bottle, 
not our Heavenly Father who has tremendous plans for us...
if we but earnestly seek his will for our lives.   

Many of you know that our adoption journey didn't start a year ago, or even two years ago.
No, our journey has been going on for many years.  

I was guilty of seeing couples having babies and wondering why God didn't bring me mine.  I have watched couples get matched almost instantly...and I have watched friends become pregnant and birth those beautiful babies all while I was waiting to be chosen.  

But through that time I had to keep going back to the truth...

I was praying for God to grant me the desire of my heart, but more importantly...I was asking for HIS will to be done in my life.  I am a firm believer in if I am praying for God's will, and we were not being matched...then logic would tell me that each of our previous situations were not God's will for our family. 

Unfortunately, we still get caught up in comparing....
we compare time lines and dates,
then get frustrated when someone else achieves a milestone before us.
We compare how many photos we have seen of our child/children.
We compare how soon our child learns that he/she has a forever family,
 wether we can send a care package... 
and if we can Skype, when, and how many times.  

Yes it is hard to wait, yes it is hard to see others receive the blessings that we may not have, 
yes it can be painful.  

But friends, have we lost sight that each and every one of us have been called by God to a personal journey to adopt our treasures.  

Ultimately, the truth is, we all have a different journey to walk with HIM.  

There are wonderful similarities that allow us to do life together.  
We may be adopting from the same country, same provence, same orphanage, same gender...

But even with these similarities, God has each of us on a personal journey.  
One that will shape us and grow us to be the Christ followers 
that HE has been grooming us to be.  

My journey will not be identical to yours and likewise yours will not be identical to mine.  

For this I am grateful!  

You see, even when I tried to expedite our journey by having ALL our paperwork sent in with our initial application fee.  
God had the perfect timing for our family.  
Obviously it was not MY timing...but HIS timing is perfect!!!

We would have never asked for the problems we had with Aaron's birth certificate or for our estimated travel time to come and go...But again...God's timing is perfect.  

He will use EVERY situation for the good of those who love him!!!  

Would I love to jump on a plane this very moment and pick up our son???  
You better believe it!  
BUT, I will choose to be overjoyed and thankful that Christ has lead us to our son, and that HE is in control of OUR journey!!

I slipped up again this week and fell into the comparing game:(  

I asked another sweet adoptive mama when she filed a certain document and where she is at now...somehow grasping at straws to learn when we can finally be united with our newest member of our family.  

But then I was quickly reminded that I have been in fervent prayer for our journey.  
And our timeline may look very different from this friend's timeline. 

Instead, I am going to rest in the blessings HE has given me!  

The truth is...we have been given the awesome privilege of Skyping with our sweet boy!!!  
I know it is a priceless gift that is not always granted.  That blessing has not been lost on us!!

We have been praying for Aaron's heart to be open and receptive to our family.  And for God to remove all fear of the future.  

We are in awe of how HE has answered these prayers!!!  

Aaron is in a FABULOUS orphanage with caregivers who love him and want the very best for his future!!!  He is absolutely gorgeous, funny, and outgoing.   He loves music, drawing, and sports. 

 He has asked Mélika to teach him to play the guitar
(not when he gets home...but now through Skype:)  
I have never seen such pure excitement and concentration!! 

and Kylee loves to show Aaron her drawings. 
Aaron looked at each one and joyfully asked her questions.      

My very favorite times have been looking up bible verses together.  He loves to read them to us.  
Until this time we had no idea he could even read in English!!

I know that we will still have difficulty communicating when we first travel for Aaron.  We are relying heavily on interpreters right now.  But oh how my heart rejoices that with the interpreter's help, Aaron is getting to know us and his fear of leaving with us will be lessened!  

I praise God for my personal journey to our son!!

Monday, October 8, 2012

Today is my new favorite:)

Oh if you could see what I see!!!!

This morning, at 7:24am to be exact...

the most wonderful gift arrived in my email box!!!!!


and not just ANY photos

Photos of our gorgeous son 

looking at the album of our family!!!

I cannot begin to tell you what a sweet gift that was to this mama's soul!!

We were blessed with photos of each stage of Aaron seeing our family, from wrapped gift to the last page.  His eyes smiled on the pages that were written in Tagalog.  It may have been because of the content, or it may have been because he could read them himself.  

I think my father summed it up best today.  
We could not have asked for a better response when he saw our family for the first time!!!

I had originally decided to declare today as 
National Aaron Knows He Has A Family Day

but truth be told...that was Friday.

So, shall be declared
National Stare At Your New Son Day!!!!

And that my friends is the holiday that I am claiming to justify accomplishing NOTHING on this freezing rainy day!!  

So, to celebrate, I have been curled up on the sofa with a fleece blanket staring at our cutie pie!!!

I think the holiday is going extremely well!  

And, there are rumors of a video!!!
So, there may be more holiday celebrations tomorrow.  


Friday, October 5, 2012


We are absolutely, completely, over the moon....EXCITED!!!!

Throughout this leg of our adoption journey we have knows that Aaron is our son...

hundreds around the world have been praying for him knowing he is our son...

but our sweet Aaron has not known.


Today the liaison for our agency was able to hand deliver our family album to our son and let him know that he is loved, and wanted by his forever family.  

Today he knows that he has not been overlooked by his heavenly father...he is no longer fatherless!!!!

We learned that photos and video were taken when Aaron got the news!!  

We hope to see it on MONDAY!!  I can say in all confidence that not much sleep will come to this mama's body between now and Monday:)

Praise God...our son knows!!!!

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

There's nothing my God cannot do!!

My God is so big, so strong, and so mighty, there's nothing my God cannot do.
The mountains are his, the oceans are his, the stars are his handy work too.
my God is so big, so strong and so mighty, there's nothing my God cannot do!!

These childhood song lyrics have been resonating in my mind this morning!!

I had myself convinced that once our referral came in that I would have a relaxed peace of mind knowing our sweet boy is ours, and have a somewhat accurate timeline for bringing him home.  

Wow, was that a misconception!!

I think the best word to describe my emotions right now is ...frantic.  
We made it over the big hurdle...we are in the home stretch...and I just want desperately to bring Aaron home...YESTERDAY!!  

You know that feeling...the one where you would scratch through a brick wall with your bare hands to get to your child on the other side if that was all that was required.  

I am feeling very, very pregnant these days, 
and I just want so desperately for the big day to come!!!

It appears that I still have not mastered the quality of patience:)  

We are at that place where we have accepted our referral and paid the fees to the ICAB.  
The album of our family that will be shown to Aaron when he learns he has a family is in the hands of our liaison in country.  

I know God's timing is PERFECT!!!  
And at the same time my mamma instinct just wants Aaron to know that he is wanted...he is loved...a family a half a world away has been anxiously awaiting him for months and months and months.  

I want to know his favorite color, his favorite sport, does he laugh with his eyes,
 is his voice smokey...has it changed yet,  where did he get the scar on his nose,
has he accepted Jesus into his heart???

Aaron could learn about us any day now.  
We have been praying for MONTHS for his heart to be prepared, 
and his anxiety to be soothed.  

And, just as HE is moving in Aaron's heart...
my big, strong, mighty God can (and will) calm this mama's frantic heart as I wait!!

There's NOTHING my GOD cannot do!!